As part of my work as a Worldwide Marriage Encounter priest I will often pick up and read different books about marriage, especially “devotionals” that seek to help the couple grow in love through prayer and acts of mercy in their marital life. One of the bonus points to all of this is what is asked of married couples in prayer and acts of mercy often apply to me as a priest in my relationships with the people of God. I have recently been going through one of these books “Forever: A Catholic Devotional for Your Marriage” by Jackie Francois Angel and Bobby Angel. I’m in the middle of the book, day 5 of week 3 where they write, “We promise fidelity not only in the “big moments” of marriage, but also in the little moments of daily life. In the daily grind of work, home life, raising children, and recreation, am I being attentive to my spouse? Am I recognizing the needs of the other person? Am I only focused on my own pleasure and desires? Do I allow little frustrations and annoyances to rob me of the joy of being with the person I love? We begin to live heroic, sacrificial love in the little moments of everyday life. Loving one day at a time leads to a lifetime of love.” (p 71-72)
I told you this works for priests too. Because while I may not be able to celebrate these daily trials as a husband or wife I do, as a priest, by changing the situations and focusing on turning the questions back towards God and the people I serve and serve with I can and do at times (daily) allow myself to love and be loved in the blessing of God’s Holy Catholic Church.
Faith and love are hard work. We need to allow this truth to sink into our souls. Faith and love are hard work but this does not mean faith and love are not joyous work, fruitful work, and of course holy work. When we focus on our acts of sacrificial love toward the other we then enter into the joyful work of love bearing much fruit in the image of God.
This is done, as they point out above, in fidelity to the promises we make towards God and each other. Our baptismal promises, the other sacramental promises we make whether as husband or wife, priest, religious or people journeying towards their vows to God and others. We do this in fidelity through choosing to work and love in unity rather than divisiveness in our lives. It is being attentive to the fidelity of love by not allowing the small sins to begin to creep into the greater loves we are called to share. It is the loving gift of healing I see so often in my ministry in Marriage Encounter in recognizing the reality of love…it is difficult but worth it to forgive in an act of love.
This means being attentive in our relationship with God and each other. When I was a sixth grade teacher at St. Lawerence the Martyr, before my call to the priesthood, my daily practice would be to get to school early and spend 15 minutes in prayer in preparation for the day. (Being attentive to God) But there were days when I “thought” I had too much to prepare for the day and prayer could be skipped. (Ignoring God) Inevitably those days didn’t seem to go a well as the days where I had taken time to pray. During the days where prayer began my work, I found that I was more attentive to hearing my co-workers, the students and their parents in the “daily grind” than at times can overtake us. It is a magic bullet…no…because…Faith and love are hard work. It seeking placing under us a good foundation to work upon, prayer and fidelity to our promises/vows, which allow us to build the loving relationship(s) God desires us to share.
After I had read the above reflection, I went to church to pray the Stations of the Cross and it focussed my prayer on the “hard work” our Savior Jesus Christ shared with us in carrying his cross inviting us to do the same. Why? Because the hard work of passion the leads to the joy of the resurrection and life in abundance. Yes, faith and love are hard work.
God Bless
Fr. Mark