“The priest does not see our deepest selves when he hears our confession; he sees our deepest selves when he gives us absolution.” Fr. Peter Gruber on confession.

I have been praying with the above quote for almost a week for many reasons. First, it is my hope this happens when my brother priests prays the prayer of absolution over me at the end of my sacramental reconciliation. And second, it is what I see and experience continually in this same prayer in “the box” each week when I celebrate the Sacrament with those who come. The quote came at a wonderful time. The parish had spent a Saturday with parents of the children preparing for their first Reconciliation and I had the blessing of sharing with the parents God’s hope, the Church’s hope and, we pray, their hope as their children come to be forgiven. It was also a time where we got to be real and talk a little, just a little, about why they may not be celebrating the Sacrament with the consistency and joy in which we are called to celebrate.
Why is that? Sometimes it’s because we don’t want to look into the dark and dusty corners, the neglected relationships or the broken heart of our life. We’ve put them in nice boxes, placed them on a shelves and only look at them when we find it absolutely necessary, which we hope is never for the most part. At least this has been my personal experience on both sides of the fence.
Why should we look into the boxes, bring them to God and then allow forgiveness to be part of our lives? Simply because we will be more peaceful, joyful and loving…nothing terrible in that I hope. I will share with you this brief story….I and a friend had a terrible falling out. Trust was broken, awful things were spoken, and a large debt was left unresolved. We stopped speaking and throughout the next 15 years or so, whenever his name was spoken, anger would rise up and I would feel the pain and remember the debt unresolved. On retreat one year the director asked us to think of a long held “sin” something that when we thought about it brought up this feeling…well this was first on my list. In the Sacrament that evening we were asked to confess the long held sin….after doing so, he asked me these three simple questions… Did I need the money now? No. Did I think I would ever get the money? No. Then why are you holding on to this sin? I don’t know? He then said Let it go.
What that moment of blessing gave to me was the willingness to look into the many other boxes that I had stacked upon the shelves and begin to open them, discard them, and not hold on to them in fear. In truth there are one or two boxes I have yet to open and sadly there are times when I add a box to the shelf. This is why the Sacrament of Reconciliation is so important…because I am more apt to take the box down sooner rather than later which helps me to lead a more peaceful, joyful and loving life.
It is where, as Fr. Gruber notes above, I become the authentic self God created me to be. I am blessed that both in hearing the prayer of absolution and speaking this prayer to the penitent I am become the instrument of participation in the grace-filled moment of love. Pope Francis puts it very beautifully, “To celebrate the sacrament of reconciliation means to be wrapped in a warm embrace.” Come and be embraced by our Lord and do not be afraid.

God Bless
Fr. Mark