I Begin To…..

Sabbath—Keeping

Stop
Why can’t I stop

All this frantic activity?
Why must I work too long hours
Too many days?
Why do I fail myself
My family
My God
By putting work and busyness
First
By believing all
Depends on me?
How do I begin to change?
What should I do?
What if I can’t say “no?”
I long for time
For quiet walks and talks
With those I love
For laughter and fun.
I long for rest

Of body, mind and spirit
To let God be God.
I long for God
To fill my life
With meaning and love.
I long to live on purpose. (p 86)
(from “Habits of the Soul” by Linda Perrone Rooney)

“Habits have a massive impact on our lives. For better or for worse, they can shape our destiny.
Resistance loves the negative patterns in your life, the bad habits. The path of lease resistance effortlessly creates negative routines, rituals, and rhythms. Do you know what the negative patterns are in your life?” (p 110)

I am sure the question Matthew Kelly asks in “Resisting Happiness” could be answered very clearly by the author of the above poem. She knows exactly what is going on in her life and seems to feel at times that she is helpless to resist the downward spiral of busyness, loneliness and and dryness in her life. What are we to do?

We are all sufferers of resistance. The poet cries out in longing for what she knows at the deepest depth of her heart will fill her with peace, joy and yes, happiness and yet there is the doubt and fear that are founded in years of bad habits of searching for the transitory pleasure and turning our back on the lasting eternal happiness. What are we to do?

If you, as I do, struggle with these habits, and I believe the we all do to one degree or another, we can take to heart the reality that God, present in our lives, will be there always to help us turn towards the light and true purpose of our lives. The purpose of holiness. We do know a few things: first that good habits take time to establish and the practice of good habits is a life long journey against resistance. My daily goal, after my heart attack, is to exercise at least 30 minutes each day of good cardio. My reality is almost every morning I wake up I try to think of all the excuses possible to not do it. My daily goal is to spend time in prayer throughout the entire day. My reality is that midday prayer continues to be de-prioritized even when I know it is the prayer that is most needed. And believe it or not, the list is much much longer but I don’t want to use too much space for it. But the point is that habits both good and bad are formed over a long period of time but the change a bad habit takes the desire to move from temporary pleasure to lasting joy.

What are we to do? I believe the last lines of the poem above can give us some instruction in change. It begins with a first step. The poet writes “I long for time” to begin to embrace happiness we are called to respond, “I begin to take time for…” It is this subtle shift in attitude and action. It is the realization that small steps taken with joy, hopefulness and blessing are much more successful in changing habits of unhappiness into the transformative life of virtue and joy than the grandiose plans that are, more often than not, a road map for failure. It is reaching out to the hand of Jesus one small blessing, one small prayer, one small act of generosity, service and mercy at a time where we embrace the joy of life. It is the blessing of knowing God is always at our side and “Strong habits will help you break through resistance. Good habits effortlessly defeat it.” (p 113)

God bless
Fr. Mark


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