Anticipation is one of the hardest feelings to deal with in our lives. It is a normal feeling especially this time of year as we watched both young and old on pins and needles waiting for the Christmas blessings of presents, family and vacations being part of the celebratory anticipation. Then there are the things that bring about anticipation like change and challenges ahead…like the renovation of a home/church.
For almost 2 years we have been planning to update the lighting and bathrooms in our church building and school and on the work began in the second day of the New Year. I wish I could say that my anticipation had not caused me restless nights nor worried days. I wish I could say that my trust in the planning and preparation led me to be calm and not filled with anxiety. But if I said that I would be a liar. It is neither good nor bad to have the worries and anxieties in the anticipation of things to come…it is our humanity. It is however bad when we allow our anticipation to narrow our focus away from the good, the blessings, the problems or anything else that may arise as we become frozen in fear and worry.
So, what are some of the practical things I have learned (again) about anticipation and the feelings that go with it in life.
First, know who you are. One of the things the preparation and anticipation has pointed out to me once again: I am not a detail person! The small minutia of most things in life is beyond me. I like looking at big details, the ideas of what we are doing and not necessary the small things which I have discovered is both good and bad and can be very frustrating to those who thrive on details. Knowing who I am, allows me to hand over to those who have eyes for such tiny (or not so tiny) details to allow them to help me see how to move forward in joy and peace rather than excessive worry.
Second, have a robust prayer life. I know what you are thinking…he’s a priest and he has to say this at least once in everything he writes. And it is true, but I discovered this long before I entered seminary or was ordained a priest. Especially as a teacher I found the practice of prayer before each day of class, to offer a blessing for my students and their families in daily Mass and seeking time in prayer when things went disastrously wrong in some part of the school day. Each and every time my anticipatory worry and anxiety went into over drive, the praying of the Rosary or reciting St. Theresa of Avilas simple prayer, sometimes at 2:00 or 3:00 a.m., helped me to place all the worst case scenarios into the perspective of what they truly were…just nightmares.
Lastly, that funny phrase we often hear: Let go and Let God! In other words, you got to have trust. You cannot control every aspect of life, the project or the relationship. Sometimes anticipation comes with wanting the end to come before the beginning. That just is not going to happen. There will be ups and downs, unforeseen problems but also blessings. Life will happen, so go back to the first, then practice the second because the lastly will happen. This is life.
God Bless
Fr. Mark.

Please pray for our parish and the lightning project and all the adaptions and changes that this will bring in the coming two months. Thank you again for all your support and blessings.