When people, even Catholics, hear the word “chastity” they often laugh, ridicule and make jokes about this Christian virtue. Chastity is often conflated with celibacy and often thought of as something odd and strange in our modern world where sating the desires of the flesh with quick pleasure and immediate activity often takes the place of a deeper and fuller life in the community.
So let’s begin with a quick quote from the Catechism of the Catholic Church, “Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of man (woman) in his bodily and spiritual being. Sexuality, in which man’s (woman’s) belonging to the bodily and biological world is expressed, becomes personal and truly human when it is integrated into the relationship of one person to another, in the complete and lifelong mutual gift of a man and a woman. The virtue of chastity therefore involves the integrity of the person and the integrality of the gift.” (#2337) So in other words, it is the human person living in relationship with another human person and the relationship becomes an expression of the greater love of God.

Tradition tells us that Mary and Joseph, in their married life, refrained from sexual intimacy. They led chaste and celibate lives. As Archbishop M. De Langalerie writes in “The Month of St. Joseph”, “The special privilege of being called the foster-father of Jesus Christ and the guardian of the Holy Virgin was a reward of Saint Joseph’s virginity, this was also the inexpressible honor given him of having Jesus repose on his virginal heart. By this first example of virginity given to the world, Saint Joseph became the father and guardian of all who make a similar vow.” (p. 108) This did not mean Mary and Joseph did not have a deep and powerful love, rather it was the a love that was both chaste and virginal. It is here we can see how this transfers into marital relationships in general, remembering the above quote from the Catechism and the joy of chaste intimate love.
Like Mary and Joseph, all husbands and wives are called to chastity. But unlike Mary and Joseph, most are not called to virginal chastity, rather they are called to a chaste love where in their sexual intimacy they seek the good and the holy in their spouse and draw forth this gift, that like St. Joseph in his virginal chastity, becomes guardian of the other’s holiness. The sexual intimacy of the married couple becomes an expression of holiness, a prayer of love, because it is directed solely at the good of the beloved…and toward the Beloved. We become who God has created us to be in the sacramental union.

This is where the reality of the nature of both chaste marriage and the chaste celibate life of priests and consecrated religious intersect and mirror each other. Fr. Thomas Dubay, S.M. reminds us that the call to holiness is a universal call and though he is speaking to the celibate life, it mirrors the chaste love of marriage. “For us “holy” refers primarily to moral goodness: humility, patience, gentleness, temperance, honesty. For the ancient Hebrew it referred first of all to closeness to the All-Holy one, to a being set apart from the ordinary creation and reserved in some special manner for the utterly Other, the Lord himself. Yahweh’s people were “holy” not because they excelled in humility or temperance but because they had been called from the ordinary mass of mankind to a special relationship with the one God.” (P 32 from “and you are Christ’s”) This would have been St. Joseph’s understanding, that he had been called to be set apart, not just in virginal chastity but in his special call to holiness as husband of Mary and foster-father to Jesus the Christ and to live out this “vocation” was to be in a special relationship with our Father in heaven. Or as stated above, St. Joseph becomes who he is created to be.
Once more the Catechism reminds us, “The chaste person maintains the integrity of the powers of life and love placed in him. This integrity ensures the unity of the person; it is opposed to any behavior that would impair it. It tolerates neither a double life nor duplicity in speech.” (CCC #2338) What is this “unity of the person”? Simply the soul and body are united in one purpose…the fulfillment of God will in life. We recognize, because I am one of them, some people are called to the vocation of the chaste celibate life as a priest or person in the consecrated religious life. And these vocations need our support and our young people need to hear this support so we all may find fulfillment in following God’s will in our lives. But to return to the main point, chastity is a virtue for all because it is the uniting of the body and soul in a intimate and passionate relationship with God, in marriage through sexual union in the beloved spouse in sacramental grace and blessing, and in celibate chastity through the deep and profound grace of God’s love in community of the Church.
Final word….all are called to holiness and let the example of St. Joseph fills with the call to be in the “special relationship with the one God.”
God bless
Fr. Mark

“Live in such a way that all may know that you bear outwardly as well as inwardly the image of Christ crucified, the model of all gentleness and mercy. For if a man is united inwardly with the Son of the living God, he also bears his likeness outwardly by his continual practice of heroic goodness, and especially through a patience reinforced by courage, which does not complain either secretly or in public. Conceal yourselves in Jesus crucified and hope for nothing expect that all men be thoroughly converted to his will.” (St. Paul of the Cross)

The quote above reminds us of that what we do is who we are and what we do is a reflection of our inward unity with love. And this is God’s hope, that we may all be what we do and have the inward unity of love…this is what Jesus did and does in our life and the life of every Christian.

But here is the struggle of the Christian life, we are called to actively pursue but at the same time to rest in the peace of Christ. We are challenged to live our faith boldly and heroically and also to wait upon the grace of God is fill our hearts.
“We do not obtain the most precious gifts by going in search of them but by waiting for them. Man cannot discover them by his own powers, and if he set out to seek for them he will find in their place counterfeits of which he will be unable to discern the falsity.” (p.73 Simone Weil from “Waiting for God”)
The temptation in my life is to move before I pray. To make plans before I consult God. To think I must work harder for Jesus rather than to work with Jesus in this time and place. When I am tempted to do this I miss the narrow road, the open gates and the invitations to be with and take the short cut and seek to climb the fence and hop over into the field rather than walk the way of the Cross of Jesus Christ.
I can name a hundred instances (just in the last month) where I put the cart before the horse rather than taking time. I know as I read Sacred Scripture and even a spiritual book that I can tend to fly ahead rather than take my time in prayer and allow the words to soak into my soul. And yes, I can often offer my own two cents into a conversation without really thinking about what is dribbling out of my mouth or if my opinion is truly necessary or profitable in the conversation.
As St. Paul of the Cross reminds us, to be converted to the will of Jesus is to begin to allow him to speak in our hearts and then in our mouth. And this requires a active prayer life involving the time of silence and contemplation to be able to hear the word of God and see His work in front of our eyes so in this we may begin to emulate and participate in this work.
“Don’t forget that Jesus never works alone. He invites you to share in his magnificent labor of love and its rewards. He has a special role for you, a part for you to play in this drama of salvation and all you have to do is say “yes.”” (p 33 Matthew Leonard from “Louder than Words”)
Just as Jesus invited the Twelve and the many other women and men to work alongside him in his earthly ministry, he continues to invite us to the same work, never alone, within the Catholic Church the Body of Christ. Knowing Jesus, is knowing his Bride the Church. The special role begins with the gift of life where we then follow him by listening, sharing and acting in the image of his ministry on earth. Are we willing to hear his invitation, say “yes” and then move forward? It must be in that order or we will ultimately follow the false and counterfeit idols of this world.
God Bless
Fr. Mark

St. Joseph: Patron of a Happy Death

Saint Joseph dwelt with Jesus for nearly 30 years in an intimacy that the angels might have envied and in the capacity of father. We should often reflect on what we owe Saint Joseph in consideration of the numerous graces that he obtained from Jesus for all men, but especially for poor sinners. (p 120)

On this week when we celebrate All Souls Day it is good to remember the happy death of St. Joseph and maybe to ponder our own mortality. People often think this is morbid but as Christians we are reminded again and again that we are made for something greater than our short time on earth. We are made for heaven. I have had this conversation many times with both the young and old where I ask this simple question, “Are you ready to die?” I don’t ask, “Do you want to die today?” because as disciples of Jesus Christ who know neither the hour or day of his return or of our being called from this life we should take time to prepare and be unafraid of what we all must face one day.
The quote above from Archbishop ……in his book, “The Month of St. Joseph” is a reminder that if we like Joseph spend our days in intimate conversations with Jesus, our Blessed Mother and those on earth around us, conversations of love and blessing, then we know the joy and truth of being loved for who we are and the graces in our life overflow in our unity with God.
We can see this in the sacramental life we are called to live where each of the Sacraments we recieve help us to stay in intimate contact with our Lord. We should think about how we come forward to the altar of the Lord, preparing ourselves with every step to hold Jesus, in the Eucharist, gently and lovingly in our hands as we recieve him Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity. Or maybe allowing the priest to place him gently on our tongue, allowing this vulnerablity to show forth the greatness of our God in humble reception.

In our sacramental life we begin to let go of the chains of the world and allow ourselves the freedom of a child. In “The Imitation of Christ” we hear these words “Try to live now in such a manner that at the moment of death you may be glad, rather than fearful. Learn to die to the world now, that then you may begin to live with Christ.”” (#23) How do we live now? This is the most important question much like when Jesus is asked the question “But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” (Lk 10:29) If I choose to live my life in seeking Jesus in my neighbor, in seeking to serve my neighbor in joy then how I live my life today becomes an act of love the lived life of the Beatitudes. This is the path for preparing and accepting the happy death.
“The Imitation of Christ” warns of the opposite to this searching for happiness, “The sins and vices in which we are so entangled that we can rarely apply ourselves to the contemplation of heaven are matters for just sorrow and inner remorse,” ( #21) When we spend our time focused on what is temporary rather than eternal, we will fall into despair. The call to holiness is the fulfillment of our most intimate desire and when we choose to contemplate the lesser and baser in the world we live a drudgery. When we see the world as a place of blessing where we are called to care for others as true neighbors and not use others and creation for selfish pleasure it is here we find the contemplation of life through death blessed in grace filled moments.
“He (St. Joseph) died filled with hope in the assurance of a blessed eternity, encouraged by the all-powerful love of Jesus and the sweet words of his immaculate Spouse.” (p 119) As daughters and sons of God we are invited as St. Joseph was to experience a fully lived life in the presence of Jesus and our Blessed Mother Mary where at the moment of death we find ourselves escorted in love to the everlasting feast of heaven and earth.
God Bless
Fr. Mark